Don't Touch My Popcorn
by Fire and Ice equals Slush
Summary: I stole Control Freak's remote and trapped Rae, Star, and Terra in the TV shows of my choice. Sequal to episode 257-494!
1. Chapter 1

Yay! Episode 257-494 (a.k.a. Don't Touch that Dial) was funny. I used to not own the Teen Titans, but thanks to Control Freak now I do, the three girls anyway. I also don't own any of the other things that are featured in this fic. No, just my OC and an anime DVD.

This fic is brought to you by Zinthos.

**Don't Touch My Popcorn……**

(In the dimly-lit jail room where you question people-place)

Control Freak: strapped to a chair

AgentM: Hello Control Freak! I'm a big fan! I am MissingNO.v.3.0 here to question you so you can be thrown in jail and you will never be seen from again!

Control Freak: You will never make me talk!

AgentM: is surprised Wow that was almost villain-y.

Control Freak: whimpers Aren't I a villain?

AgentM: To the viewing public it seems you are nothing more than a nuisance….

Control Freak: I did not do it!

AgentM: Do what?

Control Freak: Go into a T.V with the Titans to destroy them with my remote!

AgentM: is calm We can do this the easy way or the hard way….

AgentM: stuff doesn't last long Tell me where you hid the remote so I can get on with the fic!

Control Freak: Where all lost remotes are!

AgentM: Gasp!

Control Freak: Gasp!

AgentM: Gasp!

Control Freak: Meow!

AgentM: In Under the Couch Land!

Control Freak: a.k.a. Never(give it to your sibling)land!

AgentM: stands up Pixie Dust Me!

Tinkerbell: pops up and showers Mv.3.0 with sparkly powder

AgentM: A-Choo! Up, Up and Away! flies out through a conveniently placed hole in the ceiling

(the sky)

AgentM: tune of Hero-Guy on Sesame Street if you don't know it then it's kind of similar to Indiana Jones, I noticed

She's a fanfiction writer! She's obsessed!

She's a fanfiction writer! She's obsessed!

And her name is….. (dum, da, da, dum, dum, dum)

Obsessed fanfiction writer!

(Titans Tower)

Star: Robin, Cy, and BB are on the vacation-ing and taking luau and not in this fic!

Rae: Star, who're you talking to?

Star: Nevermind…. Terra's here to, for whatever the reason!

Terra: in Terra-like fashion Hi!

Rae: Guys, there's trouble in Cook's Electronics, stop being so weird!

Terra: Great! I need more anime DVD's!

Rae: mumbles which are nothing like the manga….

Star: Up! Up! And away!

Everyone: flies off

(Cook's Electronics)

Titans Girls: shopping for anime DVD's

Terra: This is one big foot-rest! sits on giant remote

Star: Doesn't that appear like…

Rae: Control Freak's freaky remote! Terra don't-

Titans Girls: are zapped into TV

AgentM: laughing in the background Mua-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Goth Boi: Hey that was almost villain-y…..

AgentM: sends Goth Boi into TV too

(In TV)

Rae: Oh no! Not again!

Terra: Say whaddie?

Star: Last time the Control Freak sent us into various television shows to manipulate us!

Rae: Oops! He did it again!

AgentM: I don't think so!

Titans: Who are you?

AgentM: Just a fan! Now submit to my will!

Rae: What will?

AgentM: I don't know, maybe the one where I gave all my money to the company that produces Aqualad plushies…. presses button on remote

Titans: Nooo! disappear

AgentM: What horrors await the Titans? pauses How should I know? memorizes TV listing

(In Lizzie McGuire)

Lizzie: My parents are killing me! My brother is annoying me! I'm struggling in school! Kate is so popular! My life is a mess! gets frustrated I should just eat dirt!

Gordo: Lizzie, life is not all that bad.

Lizzie: Never mind with the dirt! I should just be a celebrity Pop-Singer!

Miranda: wide eyed look

Titans: appear

Lizzie and Co: more wide eyed looks

Star: Where are we?

Terra: Hey we're in Lizzie McGuire! suddenly goes psycho Hilary Duff I love you!

Rae: wide eyed look

Lizzie: Who's Hilary Duff?

AgentM: appears

Rae: You know this isn't so bad….

AgentM: OH yeah?

Suddenly commercials pour in including….

JessieMcCartney: Because you live!

AgentM: Mua-ha-ha-ha-ha! laughs and covers ears with ear plugs

Titans: don't get it

AgentM: sees them unaffected Why are you not bursting into flames or screaming in pain or getting nausea?

Titans: still don't get it

AgentM: Curses! The screeching fan-boy music is unaffecting you! sends them somewhere else

(In Yugioh)

Yami: I will destroy you Marik!

Marik: Kaplooie! (randomness)

Rae: What is this show again…."Stu-pi-doh"?

Terra: No this is Yugioh! Yay-ness! glomps Marik

Star: glomps Ryou

AgentM: Step _away_ from the bishounen, titans, before I sick my 'McCartney on you!

TerraStar: whimpers

AgentM: Step one of my plan of evil…. grabs Marik and Ryou Kidnap the bishounen for myself!

TerraStar: Noooooooo!

Rae: ….

AgentM: disappears with an evil laugh

TerraStar: The fiend! Now, we're angry….

Rae: …..

Titans: jump into next screen

(In Hi Hi Puffy Ami Yumi)

AgentM: Let's take an awkward moment of silence, please….

Ami: …..

Star: …..

Yumi: …..

Terra: ……

Kaz: ...

Rae: …..

AgentM: …thank you…

(In Totally Spies)

Terra: I love this show!

Rae: Do you love every show or something?

Terra: I just watch a lot of T.V with BB, sometimes.

Rae: sniffle

Star: Did you just sniffle?

Rae: No I didn't!

Titans: fall down a hole Waaaah!

Sam: Who was that?

Alex: Like, no clue…

Clover: I think I've seen them before… like, when I was seven. And I was trapped in some heart thingie and this green guy saved me, but there was this scary girl who looked just like the blue-caped girl that disappeared but in a white cape….

Sam: …

Terra: Where are we now?….

Star: On a boat….

Rae: In the ocean….

Star: On a small boat….

Rae: With annoying theme music playing….

Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun

Jaws: pops up to eat yummy sugar-coated Titans

Star: somehow drops a plate of Glorg in the shark's mouth

Jaws: Urk…. coughs up Scooby and Shaggy

Scooby and Shaggy: Get us outta here!

Rae: Urg…Too weird…

Terra: Now where are we?

Star: In the jungle…

Rae: In a swampy lake….

Star: Where it is really quiet…..

Rae: Where is the annoying theme music?

Terra: Should we be making this much noise?

Anaconda: lunges out of the water and swallows Raven

Star: Raven!

Terra: Woo-hoo!

Star: What?

Terra: Ohh…nothing….

Anaconda: stomach starts gurgling and in an echoed voice says Azarath Metreon Zinthos and… Kaplooie! it explodes

Rae: standing in Anaconda yuck-ka

Star: yuck-ka…

Terra: yuck-ka…..

AgentM: yuck-ka….

Rae: I'll get you for this….

Rae: I had enough of this right now!

AgentM: Wha-What?

Rae: grabs remote EXPECTO PATRONUM!

AgentM: What? explodes

Rae: gets splattered by pieces of Mv.3.0 What! realizes that pieces are really sugar

AgentM: appears Ha! I knew you'd put your Harry Potter knowledge to use so I made this sculptor of sugar!

Rae: Drat?

AgentM: smiles Better luck next time! disappears

(In Pokemon)

Star: is hugging a pikachu…..

Pikachu: Pika?

Star: Star-a?

Pikachu: Pik-a…Chuuuu! electrocutes Star-a

Star-a: has X eyes

Rae: …..return? holds out a pokeball which contains the Star-a

Terra: Terr-a?

AgentM: Missing-a?

Rae: Oh for the love of Azar….

(In Yu Yu Hakusho)

AgentM: kidnapping Kurama and Hiei to sell in the otaku black market

Yusuke: What are you doing?

AgentM: motions to text above

Yusuke: oh…..

Kuwabara: You don't care?...

AgentM: Nope! He's got major punk-age….actually he might sell better than I thought… adds Yusuke to the shopping cart with Kurama and Hiei

Rae: Stop kidnapping the bishounen!

Kuwabara: thinking (it's a wonder) Why isn't she kidnapping me?...

AgentM: I might when your friends stop glomp-ing them!

Star: currently glomping on a Kurama

Terra: currently glomping on a Hiei

Rae: strikes them with a dark lightning bolt

StarTerra: are hurt

Hiei: is currently staring at Rae with a strange look

Rae: Stop staring at me with a strange look! exchanges another strange look

AgentM: strange-looking herself in a mirror for writing such randomness What brought me to such shipper evil?

(In Fairly Odd Parents because I'm watching too much anime)

Star: I'm Starfire!

Terra: I'm Terra!

StarTerra: And we're……!

Rae: ….thoroughly lame….

Jorgon Von Strangle: Von strangles all the fairies and titans and fanfiction writers

Rae: Let's get out of here!

AgentM: before we all leave Cosmo's so cute!

(American Idol)

Starfire: sings a very loud edition of a Tamaranian Folk Song

Randy: Yo!

Paula: Awww… she's so cute…

Simon: …..

Rae: What are you doing this time?

AgentM: My newest evil plan, I will judge the judges!

Terra: That's lame…

Starfire: singing breaks windows and starts earthquake

Everyone: runs out

(In Amazing Race)

AgentM: On the last episode of the Amazing Race, Terra came across some difficulties with a certain monkey…

Terra: Ahhhh Get the monkey off me! Get if off me!

AgentM: And there was some cultural problems…

Tour Guide: If you look to the left you will see the Great Wall!

Star: What is left?

Tour Guide: Now let's hop into the tour bus!

Star: What's a bus?

Tour Guide: Are you mentally retarded or something?

Star: is confused (so cute)

AgentM: And there was a lot of arguing…..

Rae: in car with Titans We were supposed to turn there!

Terra: No we turn at the next exit!

Rae: No, we missed the turn!

Terra: No, we didn't! points to map

Rae: You have the map backwards! And you're driving the car with your feet!

Terra: …there's an interesting story to that….

Titans: get to the finishing point

AgentM: Teen Titans…I'm sorry to tell you this…..but you have been eliminated from the race…..

Titans: Awww…

AgentM: Good news is, the fic is not over yet!

Titans: Noooooo!

Rae: Let me try it again…EXPECTO PATRONUM!

AgentM: Ok you got me!

Terra: Reallly?

AgentM: Yeah I give up…my fingers hurt from typing….

Rae: Oh…cool…

Star: So you'll send us home…

Rae: You do know your going to jail….

AgentM: Free anime DVD's on me!

Terra: She's good!

AgentM: Yep! Let's go home!

All: disappear

Goth Boi: Where am I?

Jaws: eats at Goth Boi

Goth Boi: THE END!

……………………………..

Please Review!


	2. Chapter 2

Hi, I wasn't thinking of doing a second chapter, but why not? People seemed to like randomness! This time it's the boys, and check out the end so you can decide who you want to get Punk'd!

I don't own Teen Titans or any show or movie that is said in this fanfiction

……………………………..

(T Tower)

Cye: Yo, Star, Terra, and Rae are not here.

BB: Dude, they're in France.

Robin: Go, I wish I was in France with Star….

Cye: No, Robin…

BB: France is hazardous to a Robin's health, especially if there is a Star involved. France, girl, and Robin don't go together. So you're not going to run away to France. We mean it, no France. No France for Robin. France. You. No!

Robin: Ok! OK!

BB, Robin, Cye: ……..

Robin: …..bye! (runs out the door)

BB, Cye: (run after him)

AgentM: (breaks in through the back door) ….where did they go!  
Goth Boi: What are you planning to do?

AgentM: I'm going to send them into the T.V….

Goth Boi: Didn't you do that last time?

AgentM: Yeah, but it was so much fun! I gotta do it again, just with the boys.

Goth Boi: Ok….

AgentM: ….yeah…

Goth Boi: …Life sucks….

AgentM: ….does it?...

GothBoi: ….well, yeah….

AgentM: ….really….

GothBoi: ….you don't think so?...

AgentM: Well from where I sit on this computer…. It's all G-O-O-D….. (runs out the door)

GothBoi: The dangers of the Point of View of a fanfiction writer….

……………………………………………….

(in the air)

Flight attendant: (perky smiles) Please take your seats. Please put on your seatbelts. Young man? Yes, you in the back with the spiky hair and cape. Yes, sit over there with the green young man and the robotic young man you walked in with. Yes, we may have no hanky-panky on this flight. No, you may not sit with her. Yes. No. No, I will not give you my digits. Yes, sit over there. Get away from me you psycho freak! Thank you. We hope you have a lovely flight.

AgentM: (storms into the plane) Everybody, don't move! I'm a secret agent/fanfiction writer/titan kidnapper! Everybody, remain calm and put your hands where I can see them!

Robin: Who are you!  
AgentM: I'm here to send you into the T.V!

Cye: Not if we have anything to say about it.

AgentM: (zaps them into the screen on top of the seats)

……………………………………………………

(in Jackie Chan Adventures)

Jackie: Jade, you must behave yourself….

Cye: Robin, you must behave yourself….

Jackie: No ninjas for you, Jade…

BB: No girls for you, Robin….

Robin&Jade: Why are you always on my case! I can't do anything with you around!

Robin&Jackie: (start to fight)

Jade: OH… they're beating each other up… neat!

AgentM: Neat!

BB: I dunno, don't you think this fight's more in the line of…. messy?

All but Rob&Jack: ……yep…. messy.

……………………………..

(In That's So Raven)

Rob: (holds jaw) Ow. Ow. Ow.

Cye: Robin, that's why you don't pick fights with Jackie Chan.

BB: Where are we now?  
Cye: That's So Raven

BB: Where? Where's Raven?

Cye: No. That's So Raven

BB: What is?

Raven(the That's So Raven one): Me! That's SO me. And that outfit does not go with your skin tone.

BB: Really? I thought it brought out the green. But the spandex rides up the tushie…

AgentM: …too much info….

……………………………………….

(The Apprentice)

Robin: WHAT!  
Slade: Hello Robin.

Robin: WHAT! What am I doing here! Why is Slade here! What is that road-kill on his head!  
Slade: (is offended) Hey! That's my hair!

Cye: Answer the other questions, please….

Slade: I'm Trumped-up and ready to take on another apprentice.

BB: WHAT!

Slade: So you must wear this cute little tie!

Cye: I ain't wearing no tie!

Slade: Then, YOUR'RE FIRED!

Robin: …good, we didn't want to work here anyway…

Slade: Fine then, YOU'RE HIRED!

Titans: NOOOOOOO!  
……………………………………………….

(Danny Phantom)

BB: A cartoon again, and a cool one to…

Danny: I'M GOING GHOST!

Robin: I'M GOING INSANE!

Tucker: Who are you?

Sam: Yeah, who are you people?  
BB: Don't you remember me, Raven?

Sam: Who's Raven?

Cye: Why are you mistaking everyone for Raven!

BB: (starts singing) 'Cause she's everywhere to me! And when I close my eyes it's her I see! She's everything I know that makes me believe… I'm not alone! Whoa-whoa-whoa….

Cye: …..

………………………………

(Spirited Away)

Cye: The next time you want to pick a fight with a phantom, don't…

Robin: OK! OK!

BB: Hey look more ghosts….

AgentM: May your eyes be mutilated by the dangerous affects of Haku's dub!

Titans: Have mercy!

Haku: Chihiro! You're not supposed to be here! Get across the river! I'll hold them back! (blows something odd)

AgentM: (thinking) 'coool he mistook me for Chihiro….'

BB: What is he blowing on us…?

Robin: A-Choo!

Cye: Robin has been contaminated, yo!

Robin: No, I'm allergic to stories with zero plot….

Haku: (wimpers)

AgentM (pats Haku like a puppy): Awww…. Be nice to Haku… This movie has a plot….

………………………………

(Home Extreme Makover me: Yay!)

AgentM (in bulldozer): Now to smash a giant "T"!

Robin: You can't tear down our house!

AgentM (runs over it): This aint' a house! It's a gigantic and completely obvious "T"! It's a wonder why your enemies can't seek you out!

BB: She's sorta right…

AgentM: Now, it's better!

Cye: Wow…

Robin: Awesome…

BB: Dude…

Goth Boi: Whatever happened to your evil schemes?

AgentM: Let them be happy about their house till we later roll in the power bills, etc.

Goth Boi: You are the most evil…

……………………….

(Static Shock)

Static: Who are you guys? Robin, what are you doing here?

Robin: Oh, I don't… really… know… Anyway, these are my friends. We're the Teen Titans.

Static: Batman told me about you guys, but I thought he said there were five of you. Or maybe he was chewing on a sandal or something…

Cye: Yo, he's so rich, he was probably chewing on a million dollar bill…

BB: And there are five of us, but the girls are in France. (digs into pocket) Here, I have some photos of them… (pulls out many photos of Raven and a few of Starfire)

Cye: You were keeping that many photos of the girls in that tiny pocket of yours…

Gear: Holy Cow! They're gorgeous!

Static: I've got some pictures here to.

Cye: Lemme see!

BB: Ha! Ha! Hey, nice underwear, Robin.

Robin: WHAT!(Grabs and hides photos but realizes that he has no pockets so he hides them in his hair).

AgentM (smiles): Good luck finding it in there!

BB&Cye&Static&Gear: NOOOOOO!

……………………………..

(in Star Wars III The Revenge of the Sith… WOOO-HOOO!)

Cye: OK, so far, Robin has fought with Rurouni Kenshin, Megaman, the Power-Rangers, and has flirted with Sabrina Spellman, Angelica Pickles, Kim Possible, and hundreds of other girls, some of which mistaken for Raven…

Robin: Yeah, yeah, yeah… So where are we now?

BB: BB SENSES TINGLING!

Cye: BB? Are you having a seizure or something?

BB: No, I don't know… I really can't explain it… It's just tha- BB SENSES TINGLING!

Robin: Don't worry. It's just that whole "disturbance in the Force" attack he gets during those geeky Star Wars conventions…

Cye: So that means…

BB: (bathed in holy light) HAAAAAAA-LLELUIAH!

AgentM: You, readers, would do it to if you were in here!

Yoda: You, fellow pointy-eared green alien like me! Come with me, you must. Defeat the new Sith Apprentice, your destiny is!

BB: (still bathed in holy light) HAAAAAA-LLELUIAH!

Yoda: Mace Windu! Come, you must!

Cye: Hooray! This is sooo cool!

Robin: Who am I going to be?

AgentM: I'll be Serra Keto, the kick-butt girl Jedi from the video game! Hi-yaaah!

Robin: What about me….?

Yoda: AAAAAHHH! Here, the turned-evil Anakin Skywalker is! Get him, you must! Get him, you must!

Robin: What! I'm not-uh, whoever you said I am!

BB: Anything you say Master Yoda…..!

BB&Yoda&Cye&Me: (attack)

AgentM: Told you this wouldn't end pretty….

……………………………..

(somewhere)

BB: Sorry, Robin, I guess we kinda got carried away…

Cye: Yeah, I didn't know what came over me…

AgentM: I was perfectly sane at the time!

BB: What?

AgentM: Nevermind.

BB: So, anyway, we're sorry Robin.

Cye: Yeah

BB: Uh… Robin?

Cye: Where's Robin?

…………………

(Punk'd)

AgentM: Hey guys! Today we're going to punk Robin. We're going to get Starfire to ask him to take her to the hair salon. They will offer to spike his hair free and there will be free masks as well. Then, they will shave his head off. Robin'll be like, "AHHH Ohmigod! What did you do to my hair!" Starfire will be played by Kitten, the hair stylist will be played by Slade. There is nothing worse than someone shaving your head bald.

Kitten: Oh Robbie-poo! Can you take me to the hair salon. I need to get this ugly red hair of mine taken care of.

Robin: Who are you?

Kitten: I'm Starfire, you're ugly, unfashionable girlfriend, silly!

Robin: No you're not, you're Kitten!

Kitten: Just take me to the salon already!

Slade: Hello, Robin.

Robin: Slade? Why're you wearing a dress and a blonde wig?

Slade: I'm not Slade, I'm Kathy! Now be a good Apprentice and let me shave your head off!

Robin: Not if I can run! (runs away)

AgentM: Awww, great. Ashton makes it look so easy… Well, Robin's gone and we're never going to get those underpants photos out of his hair. I'll tell you what, why don't you tell me who you want to get punk'd and how. Just put the name of a Titan or villain, and what type of prank we should pull. I'll decide who plays who and how it goes if you don't mind. You're prank may be in my next fanfiction chapter!

Goth Boi: Really?

AgentM: Nope, readers, you've just been PUNK'D!

Goth Boi: Aww, great…

…………………………………

AgentM: No, I'm really serious about the punk'd thing. Review me and put who you want to get punk'd and what it should be. Bye!


	3. Chapter 3

Today, we're going to do Punk'd on Cyborg, Raven, and Beast Boy. Tune into last chapter on how to get your favorite titan, villain, ally on here. I give many thanks and chocolates to the three geniuses below who gave me the ideas on each of them (your names are in bold).

………………………

AgentM: Okay, so we're going to punk Cyborg now. **Mr. brightshiny christmas tre** suggested re-wiring him to speak backwards. Enough said, right? So grab some pen and paper and let's get on with it! (I really mean it, grab a pen and paper NOW!)

Cye: Snore!

AgentM: (grabs some pliers and fiddles with Cye then electrocutes herself) Oh snap! (a bit too loudly).

Cye: Hmmm?

AgentM: Nothing, keep sleeping! Dream of beautiful, metal women!

Cye: (smiles and starts snoring again)

AgentM: (pulls out Cye's manual) Let's see, this goes here, that goes there! Alright!

Cye: (speaking backwards) Oy! No gniog s'tahw?

AgentM: HAHAHAHAHAHA! (goes into hysterics)

Cye: Ereh gniod uoy era tahw? Gnihgual uoy era yhw!

AgentM: (still in hysterics, can't get up…)

Cye: (mumbles) revetahw… Nibor dna BB dnif ot evah I won.

BB: What's up Cye! It's been three days, and I still don't know where we are! Not like I ever do, anyways.

Cye: BB! Uoy ees ot taerg s'tI! Em ot gnihtemos did M tnegA! Si ti tahw wonk t'nod tsuj I!

BB: …

Cye: …

BB: HAHAHA! (goes into hysterics)

Robin: BB? What's the matter? I can hear you all the way from the high definition channels!

BB: I don't know! But it is hilarious! (still in hysterics)

Cye: Nibor! Gnihgual BB si yhw? Ecaf ym no gnihtemos evah I od?

Robin: …

Cye: …

Robin: …okaaaaaay.

AgentM: (in the strange, hidden box with screens everywhere) This might take a minute. (one minute passes).

Robin: (ding!) I got it! He's speaking backwards!

Cye: Thaw! Sdrawkcab gnikaeps!

BB: Sey!

AgentM: (in box speaking into mike) Okay, release the women.

Star: Hello!

Robin: Star! (jumps on Star)

Star: I admire your jumping abilities friend Robin!

Rae: What's wrong with Cye?  
BB: Rae! (jumps on Rae)

Rae: (has BB all over her clothes)

Terra: Ahem!

BB: Terra?

Rae: Busted.

Cye: Arret! (arret no spmuj)

Terra: Um… when were we a couple? And why are you calling me "Arret?"

AgentM: (into Mike) Okay, that's it! (runs out of box making a dramatic entrance)

Everyone: …

AgentM: Um… this is where you tackle me, start cussing, and say your last words into the finally noticed camera?

Cye: (into camera) Oy! D'knup neeb tsuj ev'I.

AgentM: Okay! (zaps them into some other place)

**Special thanks to Mr. brightshiny christmas tre.**

Terra: Will you please get off me…?

……………………….

AgentM: So, now it's Raven's turn. **InuyashaFreak410** wants her in a pink. She will be forced to wear the dress, and find a special surprise from some special guests. Then we'll either leave her in distress… or come out and tell her "Raven, you've just been Punk'd!" I know! I know! But, we have to be ethical about this!

Raven: (is meditating in the shower, but we can't let the cameras see that, so zoom in onto Raven's costume)

AgentM: (takes costume. Replaces with pink dress)

Raven: (reaches out of shower and can't find her black outfit and cloak) Ummm… (grabs pink dress) Oh you've got to be kidding me….

AgentM: (hides in hidden box before Raven goes berserk and releases the smiting fury of Trigon)

Raven: (comes out blushing and in pink dress)

Random person in audience: (whistles)

Raven: rrrrrr….

Random person in audience: Gaaaah! (gets struck by Trigon's smiting fury)

Mysterious people who appear out of nowhere: Well, I never!

Raven: Who are you?

Mysterious people who appeared out of nowhere: Raven, we are the high class society of the P.O.R.Fs!

Raven: What?

PORFs: P.O.R.Fs! Properly-dressed Obsessed Raven Fans! And we do not approve of you wearing pink because it degrades your status and dark personality that we praise most.

Raven: Look! I had no choice, I-!

PORFs: Well, we have no choice either seeing as the hard, brutal work it takes into starting an angry mob!

POSF: (appear)

Raven: Now, who are you guys?

POSF: We are, like, the P.O.S.F! And that so totally means Peppy Overly-crazed Starfire Fans! (starts tearing) And… that dress… looks soooo… beautiful! (start hugging and crying)

Raven: I had enough of this!

PORFs: Oh are you getting angry? We would be honored to be struck by Trigon's smiting fury! (lies down, dead)

Raven: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!

AgentM: Raven?

Raven: WHAAAAAAAAT!

AgentM: You've just been… PUNK'D!

Raven: …

AgentM: …

Raven: (strikes AgentM with Trigon's smiting fury)

AgentM: (is fried to a crisp) ….ow.

**Special thanks to** **InuyashaFreak410, and we mean no offense to Raven fans who are properly dressed or Starfire fans who are overly peppy.**

Raven: Can I have my clothes back?

AgentM: I could give them back, or I could get BB over here to see your pink dress!

Raven: You wouldn't dare.

RBXR: (Raging BBXRae Fans) Pleeeeeeease!

…………………………………..

AgentM: We all know how BB has a short attention span, so we're going to put that to use. This one goes out to **Beastfire** who wants women's underwear and a spork.

Terra: BB! What are you doing here in the mall?

BB: …nothing.

Terra: Good, you can help me shop!

BB: No wait! Er- does it have to be this store?

Terra: Yeah, I'll be in the changing stalls. Wait for me right here.

BB: Um… okay, I guess.

Terra: (walks into stall)

BB: (stands for some time) Arg! I'm so bored! What was I here for again? (spots something on the floor that turns out to be women's underwear and a spork me: dun, dun, dun!) All right! (pulls the underwear over the spork so it stretches back. He pulls it back, flings it like a catapult, walks over, picks it up, and continues this to the amusement and humor of… us!) He, he! This is fun!

AgentM: (into the two-way) Okay, blonde chic. Go in.

Blonde chic: (walks into store, but accidentally walks into the line of fire of the BB's underwear) AAAAHHH! (is pelted by underwear)

BB: Urk!

Manager: Young man, you have just knocked out one of my customers with women's underwear.

BB: I didn't mean it! She walked into the line of fire!

Blonde chic: Omigod! I'm dying! Wait-I see a light!

BB: No, no, no, NO! (picks up blonde chic) Don't go near the light! It wasn't my fault!

Terra: (walks out) BB, what is-? Ack! BB! What are you doing holding that other girl!

Rae: (walks out of other stall) What's going on here…?

AgentM: Oh god, this is sweet! I didn't even expect this! (smiles)

Terra&Rae: What are _you_ doing here! …BB invited me! …Stop copying me!

Terra: BB! You got some 'splainin to do!

BB: What? Why can't I just invite you both here!

Rae: Because I'm your girl…

Terra: What are you talking about? I'm BB's girl, everybody knows that.

Rae: Oh be quiet! BB! The day has come!

Terra: Which one of us is your girl? Rae or me?

BBXTerra fans: Yeah! Pick one!

BBXRae fans: Come on, BB! Tell 'em who it is!

BB: OH GOD, NO! THE DAY HAS COME! THE APOCOLYPSE IS HERE!

BBXTerra fans and BBXRae fans wrestle

BB: (makes his escape while screaming like a girl) NO, NOT NOW! NOT NOW! I BEG OF YOU, PLEEEASE! (Spots a box that says: Break glass in case of Apocolypse aka in prevention of the choosing between an angered Terra and Raven – Spanish translation of the following is below it) Hooray! I'm saved! (breaks glass, but inside is a sheet of paper saying: You've just been PUNK'D!)

BB: I – uh – What!

AgentM: BB! You've just been PUNK'D!

BB: And YOU gotta hide me…

AgentM: Oh don't worry, this isn't a real mall. It's just an illusion at Mad Mod's place. And these aren't really Terra and Raven (pulls their faces off) They're robots!

BB: So they're not real?

AgentM: Nope!

BB: (jumps on AgentM) THANK YOOOOOOUUUUU!

AgentM: You made it out of this one, BB. But you and I both know, the day will come… Muahahaha!

**Many thanks Beastfire! You really made my day. Here! You can keep the Ravenbot and Terrabot. **

……………………………

So that's it! Raven, Cyborg, and Beastboy are done! But C'mon I need more reviews! Just tell me who you want to get Punk'd and how, without too much boring statistics. You can do Titans, villains, allies. I know you can do better than this!


	4. Meet the Apprentices

Dude, I need a break from Punk'd… so here is some randomness from our good friend, Mr. Sladykins!

AgentM: Say hello to the nice writer, Kwazi!

Slade: Um… hello.

Well, I'm having Slade have his fun because-

Slade: Because I've been abused and tortured in "The Diary of the Crazed Apprentice" for too long!

AgentM: (restrains and gags Slade) Anyway, he gets a well-deserved break from all my craziness, so I'm going to let him run through the tv shows!

…………………….

(in Avatar: the Last Airbender)

Slade: Where am I?

AgentM: One of the greatest shows on the planet!

Slade: "Single Villains who live with their Mothers?"

AgentM: (wide eyed look)…

Slade: Not that I'm one of them! I'm married! Twice I think…

AgentM: (still wide eyed look)

Slade: Stop giving me a wide eyed look! Anyway, while I'm here, I might as well find an apprentice… (walks up to random character) Do you want to be my apprentice?

Zuko: You're what?

Slade: I like you scar, it makes you look very menacing. If you serve me, we'll rule the world.

Zuko: Where is the Avatar…? Have you _seen_ the Avatar…? Are you _hiding_ the Avatar…? Do you know _anything_ about the Avatar…!

Slade: (turns head to AgentM) Who's he talking about?

AgentM: Aang, the last air bender. He's the main character that's supposed to save the world.

Slade: (turns back to Zuko) Yes, yes I do.

Zuko: Ok! I accept!

AgentM: We'll get back to you later! (zaps into another show)

……………………………

(Sailor Moon… or should I say…)

Fighting titans by moonlight,

Winning apprentices by daylight,

Never has the self control to not fight,

He is the one named Sailor Slade.

He will backstab any friend,

Shown in episodes like Apprentice, Aftershock, and The End,

Dude, this guy needs a girlfriend…

He is the one named Sailor Slade!

Sailor Robin!

Sailor Terra!

Sailor Raven! …I guess?

Sailor... uh, Slade!

With being someone else's servant all new to him,

He is the one name Sailor Slade.

Fighting titans by moonlight,

Winning apprentices by daylight,

With his Sailor Scouts to turn on him,

He is the one named Sailor Slade,

He is the one named Sailor Slade,

He is the one, Sailor Slade!

Slade: I feel so foolish…

………………………………….

(Kim Possible)

Dr.D: (hears a loud crash outside) SHEGO! (looks out the window to see Shego and Slade in his hover-craft)

Shego: See, ya, Drakken!

Dr.D: SHEGO! Where are you going!

Slade: She's joining up with me, because you're a loser and you're blue!

Shego: Yeah, he's so much hotter than you! …and richer! And more irresistibly evil!

Slade: Ta-ta! (flies off)

Dr.D: SHEEEEEEEEEEGOOOOOOOOOOO!

AgentM: (enters just as Slade flies off) Whoa… that was fast… (exits again)  
………………………………..

(back to Yugioh)

Slade: Sign up! Be my apprentice! Get this free T-Shirt! (Says: Slade is Da Man!)

Ryou: Hello, is this where we sign up for internship?

Slade: You can't be my apprentice! You look too sweet and innocent!

AgentM: No, no. This is Ryou Bakura who is possessed by the evil spirit of the Millennium Ring!

Slade: Are you kidding, me? This kid doesn't look like he's possessed!

Ryou: (Ring starts to glow and Yami takes over)

YamiB: That's what you think, mortal. Want to see how much of your blood I can spill while checking out some of your inner organs before I fry them with my Ring's black fury and banish the remains to the Shadow Realm where they would slowly be chewed on by horrific monsters and terrifying creatures? (brandishes a very wicked looking knife)

Ryou: (takes over his body) You promised you wouldn't do that anymore! Anyway, sorry about all that fuss, I hope my Yami wasn't too rude to you…

Slade: (looks very scared) …mommy…

Malik: (pops out of nowhere) Wow! What's going on? This looks like fun!

Slade: And what are you supposed to be?

AgentM: He's Malik Ishtal, the Egyptian kid who after having suffered the life of a tomb-keeper, he swore to kill Yugi and the Pharoah with his Egyptian God Cards! He also has the Millineum Rod, which can make people do stuff against their will!

Malik: Sing for me, mind slave…

Slade: (jumps on the table) R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me! R-E-S-P-E-C-T-! (leans down to AgentM and whispers) …this is a kid's show?

…………………………………………

(the Powerpuff Girls)

Slade: WHY are we in this cartoon?

AgentM: Because you want more cool bad-guys to make your apprentices, but I took the liberty of giving more variety into your selection with ultra cute bad-guys!

Slade: Who then?

AgentM: Say hello to the Rowdyruff Boys!

Brick: I am soooooooo much smarter than you!

Boomer: I like poodles!

Butch: hehehehehe… EVIL! Hehehehe…

Slade: They're just children!

AgentM: (points to each RRB) He's bossy, he's adorably stupid, and he's just psycho!

RRBoys: (beat Slade up with superpowers)

……………………………………….

(Dexter's Lab; boo-hoo the hardly ever show it anymore…)

Slade: Will this show have any apprentices?

AgentM: I think… Well, I came here because we got the fiery apprentice, and the chic apprentice, and the sadistic/psychotic apprentices, as well as the hyper cute apprentices…

Slade: So… what's that leave?

AgentM: dumdumdaDA! The geeky apprentice!

Slade: …

AgentM: …

Slade: …why do I need one of those?

AgentM: …for variety, duh…

Slade: And where can I find this geeky evil?

AgentM: (holds up Mandark) Here's a geeky evil!

Mandark: I am Mandark, the boy genius! Hahahahahahahahahaha… (trails off)

Slade: Fine! Fine! Do what the AgentM would do…

AgentM: that's the spirit…

…………………………………………

(Fairly Odd Parents)

AgentM: Hold on! Hold on! Back track! Add another cute apprentice to the list!

Slade: Sure… why not…

AgentM: ANTI-COSMO!

Slade: bless you…?

AgentM: See? This is Anti-Cosmo. Has all the cuteness of the real Cosmo, but add in a British accent, plus the proper demeanor and you get ANTI-COSMO!

Anti-C: Good day to you, sir.

Ryou: Great Scotts! That's not fair! You've bloody already got someone with a Brit accent!

AgentM: …let's take this argument somewhere else…

………………………………………

(Recap)

AgentM: There you have it… you're army of tv apprentices!

Roll call:

AgentM: First, you got Zuko, the fiery apprentice!

"He's a tough teen with the power to firebend who has a sad past and a short temper!"

Zuko: _Where_ is the Avatar?

AgentM: And then you got Shego, the chic apprentice!

"She's the negative, sarcastic dudette whose hands wield hot, green plasma."

Shego: tch…

AgentM: Next, you have Yami Bakura, the sadistic apprentice, and Malik Ishtal, the psychotic apprentice!

"One is the spirit of an ancient Egyptian thief who possessed the innocent Brit Ryou Bakurra and has the powers of the Millineum Ring. The other is an Egyptian boy who had a troublesome childhood and a vow to kill the pharaoh and also has the powers of the Millineum Rod. Both wield the darkness and the monsters within it during 'shadow games.'"

Yami Bakurra: I want to steal the Millineum Items!

Malik Ishtal: I want to kill the pharaoh!

Ryou Bakurra: I want you out of my body!

AgentM: Then, you have Brick, Boomer, and Butch, the hyper cute apprentices!

"Created from snips, snails, and puppy dog tails, these three children are the product of pure evil and chaos."

Brick: I am too smart! For all of you!  
Boomer: Poodles!

Butch: hehehehe… EVIL! Hehehehe

AgentM: Next up! Mandark, the geeky apprentice!

"This nerd has a huge head and an urge to be the better boy genius than his arch rival."

Mandark: hahahahahahaha! (trails off)

AgentM: Last, we have Anti-Cosmo, the Brit apprentice!

Ryou: Hey!

AgentM: Fine, fine, the suave apprentice!

"The alter ego of a cheerful and sometimes stupid fairy, this 'anti-fairy' may be tiny and huggable but also dark and intelligent (a very nasty combo)."

Anti-C: Jolly good!

Slade: Never had I had so many apprentices! The more the merrier!

AgentM: Of course, the more there are, the bigger the chance for betrayal!

Slade: But these guys are true villains like me, which means they weren't good guys ever before!

………………………

AgentM: not quite "The End" if you catch my drift… but stay tuned… and R&R!


	5. The Plan

Quick 'lil announcement about the progress of my fics. I've been getting T of H hiatus, and it's highly contagious. I want to thank you for the flowers and the "get better" cards. My next AgentM Diary story would be a chapter after this story. So there's this, and then the next chapter, and then you'll be able to check out the new story.

Hehe, I'm very amused that you guys actually pretty much "get" my apprentices. I trust shuffled the deck of cartoons I watched and randomly picked my favorite evils. Cool, eh?

Chapter 5 The Plan

Slade: Now, we must come up with an evil plan!

AgentM: Hooray evil plan!

Mandark: I, Mandark Boy Genius, will create this fiendish plan for you!

Slade: Wow! I never knew how convenient boy geniuses can be! Sure!

Anti-C: Now, hold on old chap! I'm just as intelligent and evil as he is.

Slade: Great!

Brick: I stilllll to smart for you all!

Slade: And, the snobby child, too! Wow! This is working out so greatly! Wow!

AgentM: What about you, Shego?

Shego: (uninterested) I'll be more of the muscle of the group.

AgentM: (hops over to Zuko) Zuko? Would you like to help in the plan?

Zuko: Are _you_ keeping the Avatar?

AgentM: Sigh… predictable. Just sit there and think of more ways to ask, "Where's the Avatar?"…

Shego: Hey, do you want to spar?

Zuko: Sure!

Zuko&Shego: (start a very fiery, intricate martial arts fight)

YamiB: Don't bother asking me, mortal.

AgentM: I wasn't gonna! You're plans may be ferociously evil, but you haven't succeeded in 5,000 years!

Malik: She's true on that Bakurra!

YamiB: Shut up! I was trapped in the Millineum Ring!

Malik: Heh! You're not even bothering to ask those two, are you? (motions towards the 2 other RRB)

AgentM: You got me all figured out… (mumbles) anime bishie…

Malik: Hey! I'm proud to be that!

Mandark: Ok! We've figured out our new evil plan!

Slade: Oh goody-goody gummy bears! I'm just so "wow"-ed about all this! Wow!

Anti-C: First off, we shall proceed to build a doomsday device. Next, we will place it at point A and eradicate your enemies, "the teen titans" as point B which would have them ricochet to point C which will set off a detonator that will "ka-boom!" the area…

Slade: Wow…!

Anti-C: I'm not finished yet. Then, the tremor will cause the nearby mountain to become an active volcano. We will harness the titans via Nerds Rope™ and licorice tubes and then throw them_ into_ the volcano.

Brick: The Nerds was my idea!

Slade: That's just-!

Anti-C: The molten lava will singe the hair of the titan, "Starfire," who will scream her high-pitch girly alien scream and set off a cataclysmic meteor!

Slade: Yeah, and-!

Anti-C: Then, the meteor will strike precisely on the Titans who will perish in cataclysmic molten screaming fury!

Slade: …

AgentM: …

Anti-C: …

Mandark: …

Brick: …

Butch: …

Boomer: My poodle!

YamiB: …

Malik: …

Shego: …

Zuko: …(or at least tries to, is severely defeated by Shego)

AgentM: …

Slade: …wow…

……………..

R&R


	6. The Battle Royal DUNDUNDUN!

Tehee… I have a Christmas gift for y'all. It's "Raven got run over by a Reindeer." Check it out.

My new story will come out on Friday. I'm just updating this today because I'm off… today… my district sucks… no offense, district.

………………………..

Ok! Scratch that! Skip the long villain plan and dive in to the Titans vs. TV show villain fight!

AgentM: Let's get ready to RUMBLE!

Hold on, OC!

AgentM: What?

I think we should switch to regular writing mode instead of script mode.

AgentM: Why should we do that?

Because… It's easy to write battle scenes like that. Remember Tournament of Heroines?

AgentM: Oh yeah. That other story I was never in.

Yeah… anyway… I'm not doing script format.

AgentM nodded. "Very well," she replied.

………………………………..

Robin glared at the horizon where there was a bit of sunlight peering over the land towards the east. Before him stood Slade's apprentices, and beside him stood his titans. This was the great clash of the cartoons.

Prepare yourself.

Robin started first, bounding towards the two villains closest to him. He prepared his long metal pole from his suit and came charging at Zuko, the fiery apprentice. To his surprise he was greeted with huge blows of fire.

Luckily, he dodged these quickly and came to strike again but was held back by the barrage of attacks by Shego's plasma fists.

The two flames started beating Robin mercilessly.

"Wow," he could only exclaim. "You guys are good."

"I've had the best training," Zuko muttered.

"Self-taught," Shego proclaimed proudly.

Robin breathed heavily as swear poured from his brow.

Things were going to get warm.

……………………………………

"Robin!" Starfire screamed and sent a flash of green starbolts towards Zuko's way to help Robin. To Zuko's aid came the three Rowdy Ruff Boys who ran up to Starfire and fisted her right in the jaw. Starfire was taken aback by the attack from the three cute children but her eyes and fists became green once again. To her surprise, the Rowdy Ruff Boys began to cover their fists with energies of red, green, and blue as well. Starfire struggled to parry these blows of energy with her own starbolts.

"You seem very skilled for young children," Starfire gasped in the tiny second she could take a breath from the blows.

"You fight good for a grown-up!"

Starfire flew up to enormous height, but the boys joined her. Apparently, the skies weren't safe either.

Streams of colored light beamed from their eyes and clashed with the beam of Starfire's.

………………………………………………

And so they continued their sky-born battle while Raven watched from below.

"This has gone far enough," muttered Raven as her own fists grew black as pitch and her mind calm for the battle.

"It has indeed," came a statement from behind.

Raven turned to find Yami Bakurra and Malik Ishtal.

"You want to see real shadow sorcery, mortal?" asked Yami Bakurra with the ring around his neck glowing gold.

"I am no mortal," said Raven.

Yami Bakurra chuckled and Malik smiled, the rod he clasped started to glow as well. Then, a rush of sweeping darkness billowed from out of their millineum items and filled the entire battle arena.

"I see you have summoned the shadow realm…" Raven said failing to mask her interest. "I've heard only the great sorcerers from Ancient Egypt could do that."

Malik held up a dueling card as huge monsters began to appear before Raven. "Wow. You've done your homework."

Raven smiled. At least to her this was going to be fun.

"Let the Shadow Game begin…"

………………………………..

A few paces from her, Beast Boy was already into his battle with Anti-Cosmo. The anti-fairy was very clever… far too clever for Beast Boy. In the blink of an eye, he was able to jinx several items around Beast Boy, perform intricate curses, and transform just as well as Beast Boy could into his animals.

"So what exactly are you anyway?"

"I'm an Anti-Fairy, silly boy."

"Well… you're kicking my butt pretty hard for a tiny fairy."

"Yes, it seems I am."

Beast Boy transformed into a huge green dinosaur while Anti-Cosmo became a blue dragon.

"I'm also not limited to mere animals."

"Oh, yeah?" Beast Boy yelled. "I'M GONNA MAKE YOU EXTINCT!"

……………………….

And Cyborg was dueling the cybernetic genius, Mandark, who controlled his very own robot. The two robots crushed each other to bits.

"Yo! I'm not losing to a nerd!" Cyborg screamed as he crushed through the robot's interior.

Mandark thrusted Cyborg off of him and smiled.

Cyborg ignited his sonic cannon and sent a stream of blasts to Mandark who parried these blows with his metallic hand, melting and flaking off from touching the stuff.

"You're efforts are futile, droid," screamed Mandark.

"Yeah, and I'm gonna shove that pocket protector down your throat!"

Mandark gasped as from behind one of the blasts Cyborg leaped and threw himself onto Mandark and ripped the machine covering him apart.

…………………………….

Robin screamed in agony as he tasted the rush of fire shoved into his stomach by a kick. His clothes were severely burned, if he wasn't gently lined by titanium he would have died.

'I can't overpower them…' Robin thought to himself. 'And they are way more advanced in their martial arts than me.'

"This is battle is a waste of time! You're no comparison to the skill of the Avatar!" shouted Zuko.

"Avatar this. Avatar that. You've giving me a headache," groaned Shego.

Shego bent over and picked up Robin firmly by his shirt.

"I'm going to make you scream. I'm going to make you beg. I'm going to make you cry, little boy," taunted Shego. "But _that_ is what will be a waste of time, because I would have already ripped your limbs apart."

Robin looked up with his bruised face. "Can't I just say one more thing?"

"Spill."

"There's an explosive on your back…"

"W-WHAT!"

Ka-Boom.

……………………………..

The three rowdy boys were not as strong as Starfire, but there were three of them.

And that was a horrible, painful disadvantage.

If Starfire blocked the blows of one, the other would come from behind and deliver a punch that would have broke an Earthling's back.

If she held down one, the other would come sending thousands of blasts of colored energy raining down on her.

"Are you ready to say 'uncle?'" asked Brick.

"I will not say the 'uncle' for you have not defeated me yet!"

'Such naughty boys,' Starfire thought. 'In my home planet such behavior would require the use of the box of a thousand needles.'

"Well, C'mon! Get up! It's not fun if you're dead!" Brick chuckled.

Starfire smiled.

"What you children need is a good TAMARAN-STYLE SPANKING!" she screamed and rushed towards Brick.

Before he could react, Starfire grabbed Brick by the ear with the mite of an elephant and threw him down onto her knees. Then, her hand glew burning green and she proceeded to whoop the boys HARD!

Like HARD-HARD!

Like-their butts became concave-HARD!

…………………………………..

"Azarath-Metrion-ZINTHOS!" Raven screamed as she sent a blast of shadow at "Dark Necrophia."

The duel monster just dodged and the two Item-holders laughed.

"She's actually doing pretty good, huh Bakurra?" said Malik.

"Indeed…" replied Bakurra.

Raven gasped for air. The darkness was particularly strong… hence the term "shadow realm." It was engulfing her by the second, swallowing her in.

But if she just kept a clear mind…

"Ahg...!" she screamed as another horribly ugly looking monster attacked her. It… It _bit_ her. It just bit her! Creatures from a child's card game were coming alive from cheap cardboard and _bit_ her! This infuriated Raven greatly.

Raven stood up and wiped the blood trail down her chin with her sleeve. These shadows may be powering _their_ monsters, but it was also doing loads for her _other_ side.

"Just so you know…" spoke Raven in a soft tone. "I know exactly what it feels like to be you. To have split personalities… other sides… taunting voices in your head licking at your ears…"

And her eyes began to glow red… and an extra pair open up on her forehead as well.

Yami Bakurra gave a disgusted frown. "For your information… I _am_ that other side."

Dark Raven chuckled. "Pardon me…" she said smiling.

And she lashed out at the monsters. Teeth and claws.

……………………………

Beast Boy and Cyborg weren't fairing so well…

Beast Boy was getting beat up by a fairy.

Cyborg was getting beat up by a nerd.

Fans everywhere chuckle…

………………………………

"And who will the winner be?" AgentM smiled at Slade.

"I don't know. It's a pretty tough battle."

"Well, I think that is really all up to the writer to decide."

"Yeah, yes it is."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…so who's going to win?"

"It's up to the writer, and by the looks of things… she can't make up her mind!"

"You're kidding!"

"No, I'm not."

"You can't be serious! If the writer can't make up her mind, I can't successfully beat the Titans!"

"You snooze you loose, Kwazi…"

"No, this can't be happening! Why is it so hard for the writer to finish?"

"Because… she likes both sides!"

"That's impossible! What's going to happen to the fic!"

"I guess she's just going to continue letting me Punk'd people…"

"Nooooo! No! No! No!"

"Kwazi… life's tough. Get a helmet."

……………………………………………….

Aww… gee. I'm not really sure what to do. I'm finishing the villain part of this story. I don't know if I'm going to continue this… It'll just be… y'know… when I feel like it?

I'm sorry I leave you all hanging.

I love the Titans.

And I love these villains.

If you like, you can tell me who do you think should have won which battle…

I'd love to hear your opinions.


End file.
